hmmmm......
is it possible that guys are actually more emotional than the gals??
can be.
but obviously guys respond and express their emotions in a way that is vastly different from gals lah... DUH!
do we often see (most) guys emoting their life away?
not really for me.
but i really don't know about yourself...
oh wells...
there i go again. another oh wells.
oh wells...
i dunno man...
maybe we should go for some courses to learn how to communicate, and express accurately. or even handle our extreme feelings... like guilt, anger,lonliness, isolation, non chalance, etc etc etc
or we can continue on in life as we relate to others, making mistakes of our own, and learning along the way.
which is A.K.A. learning it the hard way.
gotta brush up my skills.
refinement... and refinement and growth comes as we admit our mistakes, face the (ughh) consequences, and of course make sure we do not repeat that.
hur.
of course it's so easy for me to say and type...
dunno lar...
i really dunno.
what are my thoughts and feelings sometimes...
"what's wrong?"
i wonder sometimes...
hai...
sometimes we blind ourselves by ourselves.
we are overwhelmed by our own feelings, our own rut of our lives.
and it really is an indication of what our lives are in relation to Him...
argh. what a struggle. or struggles?
it seems, that i'm blogging for the sake of blogging.
and something's just missing.
the flair i used to have at one (short) point, now, i just cannot seem to make any sense of what i'm writing anymore.
i can't seem to be typing sense nowadays.
or even reflect well.
argh.
[my true feelings and thoughts to my own journal! you never know who's reading... ] ;P who am i? who are the ones i trust? i can only trust in Him as my confindate sometimes....
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Monday, August 14, 2006
exams are here... however...
I Will Sing- Don Moen
Lord You seem so far away
A million miles or more it feels today
And though I haven't lost my faith
I must confess right now
That it's hard for me to pray
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give the grace
With all that's in my heart
Chorus:
I will sing I will praise
Even in my darkest hour
Through the sorrow and the pain
I will sing I will praise
Lift my hands to honor You
Because Your Word is true
I will sing
Lord it's hard for me to see
All the thoughts and plans You have for me
But I will put my trust in You
Knowing that You died to set me free
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give grace
With all that's in my heart
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
oh wells.
where am i now?
who am i?
how, Lord?
why, Lord?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
there's this classic test where we imagine our own funeral...
and you're one of the ppl attending (somehow)....
what will your eulogies be?
(but of course, eulogies only tell of the nicer ones la... u dont go to a funeral and the speakers go up and say what a loser you have been, or how stupid you are... but it's worth thinking thru... )
what will we be remembered for?
whose lives have we touched, or hurt?
what will be the one thing that ppl will say abt you?
what do you want others to remember you?
oh wells.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
crap, i hope i dun use this type of few-thoughts/posts-in one too often...
it shows how much i deproved... :( haha, and maybe the state of my mind and my life...
gotta go TRY to mug!
exams on wed!
Lord You seem so far away
A million miles or more it feels today
And though I haven't lost my faith
I must confess right now
That it's hard for me to pray
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give the grace
With all that's in my heart
Chorus:
I will sing I will praise
Even in my darkest hour
Through the sorrow and the pain
I will sing I will praise
Lift my hands to honor You
Because Your Word is true
I will sing
Lord it's hard for me to see
All the thoughts and plans You have for me
But I will put my trust in You
Knowing that You died to set me free
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give grace
With all that's in my heart
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
oh wells.
where am i now?
who am i?
how, Lord?
why, Lord?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
there's this classic test where we imagine our own funeral...
and you're one of the ppl attending (somehow)....
what will your eulogies be?
(but of course, eulogies only tell of the nicer ones la... u dont go to a funeral and the speakers go up and say what a loser you have been, or how stupid you are... but it's worth thinking thru... )
what will we be remembered for?
whose lives have we touched, or hurt?
what will be the one thing that ppl will say abt you?
what do you want others to remember you?
oh wells.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
crap, i hope i dun use this type of few-thoughts/posts-in one too often...
it shows how much i deproved... :( haha, and maybe the state of my mind and my life...
gotta go TRY to mug!
exams on wed!
Monday, August 07, 2006
Touching Triathlon
When Rick Hoyt was 15, he communicated something to his father that changed both their lives. "Dad," the mute quadriplegic wrote in his computer after his father pushed him in a wheelchair in a five-kilometer race, "I felt like I wasn't handicapped."
Rick, now 37, has had cerebral palsy since birth. But he has always been treated simply as one of the family, included by his now-divorced parents in almost everything brothers Rob and Russell did.
"They told us to put Rick away, in an institution, (because) he's going to be nothing but a vegetable for the rest of his life," his father remembers.
"We said, 'No, we're not going to do that. We're going to bring Rick home and bring him up like any other child,'" says Dick Hoyt, 59, a retired lieutenant colonel with the Air National Guard. "And this is what we have done."
And how.
'Every Boston Marathon since 1981'
For more than 20 years, Dick has either towed, pushed or carried Rick in a string of athletic challenges including every Boston Marathon since 1981 and, most recently, last month's Ironman Triathlon World Championships in Hawaii.
For that event, competitors have to swim 2 1/2 miles through the ocean and then peddle a bicycle 112 miles before running a hilly, 26.2-mile marathon.
In the triathlon swim, Rick lies on his back in a rubber raft attached by rope to a wetsuit vest worn by his father. In the bike portion, Rick sits in a chair attached to the front of Dick's bike, and on the run, Dick pushes Rick in the race chair.
This year, it took them 16 hours and 14 minutes to finish the 140-mile day of reckoning -- about two hours slower than their first try, in 1989. But time isn't the point. Teamwork is. The Hoyts are the only tandem ever to complete the Ironman Triathlon World Championships together.
'The biggest smile you ever saw in your life'
The spark for this lifetime of patience and devotion was ignited in 1977.
The teen-age Rick asked his father if he could participate in a five-kilometer (3.1 mile) race to benefit an athlete paralyzed in an accident. Dick agreed and pushed his son the entire distance in a jerry-rigged chair that now resides in the Massachusetts Sports Hall of Fame.
As they crossed the finish line that day, Rick flashed "the biggest smile you ever saw in your life," his father told CNN. When they got home, Rick went to a specially built computer that allowed him to communicate using a head switch to select letters and spell out words.
The message Rick typed, expressing his joy of feeling "like I wasn't handicapped," began an odyssey of love that continues to this day, taking father and son to competitions around the world. It even inspired Dick to learn how to swim.
"He's the one who has motivated me because if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be out there competing," says Dick. "What I'm doing is loaning Rick my arms and legs so he can be out there competing like everybody else."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
reminds me of the poem "footprints in the sand"
our Father in heaven carried us all along... we didnt have to do anything.
When Rick Hoyt was 15, he communicated something to his father that changed both their lives. "Dad," the mute quadriplegic wrote in his computer after his father pushed him in a wheelchair in a five-kilometer race, "I felt like I wasn't handicapped."
Rick, now 37, has had cerebral palsy since birth. But he has always been treated simply as one of the family, included by his now-divorced parents in almost everything brothers Rob and Russell did.
"They told us to put Rick away, in an institution, (because) he's going to be nothing but a vegetable for the rest of his life," his father remembers.
"We said, 'No, we're not going to do that. We're going to bring Rick home and bring him up like any other child,'" says Dick Hoyt, 59, a retired lieutenant colonel with the Air National Guard. "And this is what we have done."
And how.
'Every Boston Marathon since 1981'
For more than 20 years, Dick has either towed, pushed or carried Rick in a string of athletic challenges including every Boston Marathon since 1981 and, most recently, last month's Ironman Triathlon World Championships in Hawaii.
For that event, competitors have to swim 2 1/2 miles through the ocean and then peddle a bicycle 112 miles before running a hilly, 26.2-mile marathon.
In the triathlon swim, Rick lies on his back in a rubber raft attached by rope to a wetsuit vest worn by his father. In the bike portion, Rick sits in a chair attached to the front of Dick's bike, and on the run, Dick pushes Rick in the race chair.
This year, it took them 16 hours and 14 minutes to finish the 140-mile day of reckoning -- about two hours slower than their first try, in 1989. But time isn't the point. Teamwork is. The Hoyts are the only tandem ever to complete the Ironman Triathlon World Championships together.
'The biggest smile you ever saw in your life'
The spark for this lifetime of patience and devotion was ignited in 1977.
The teen-age Rick asked his father if he could participate in a five-kilometer (3.1 mile) race to benefit an athlete paralyzed in an accident. Dick agreed and pushed his son the entire distance in a jerry-rigged chair that now resides in the Massachusetts Sports Hall of Fame.
As they crossed the finish line that day, Rick flashed "the biggest smile you ever saw in your life," his father told CNN. When they got home, Rick went to a specially built computer that allowed him to communicate using a head switch to select letters and spell out words.
The message Rick typed, expressing his joy of feeling "like I wasn't handicapped," began an odyssey of love that continues to this day, taking father and son to competitions around the world. It even inspired Dick to learn how to swim.
"He's the one who has motivated me because if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be out there competing," says Dick. "What I'm doing is loaning Rick my arms and legs so he can be out there competing like everybody else."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
reminds me of the poem "footprints in the sand"
our Father in heaven carried us all along... we didnt have to do anything.
of leading others further than you've gone, and of rebel fingers.
"I cannot lead anyone further than I have gone... "
think abt it... (for me lah).
do we sometimes take our freedom for granted? Though we do not have a kilometre-long list of dos and donts, but have we compromised? compromised too much.
that we take everything as ok. if you get my drift...
just cant get organised. the mess of my thoughts, the mess of my home, the mess of my life.
yea.. my "fingers are now running faster than my brain and heart"...
oh wells..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
sometimes i wonder, what or who do we go to for our encouragement?
sometimes i wonder, also, what some of us do just to get that phrase of encouragement.
i guess different people have been brought up differently and will take different things as their personal encouragement. and even the extent to which a person needs to be encouraged continually is also a variable (not x or y or xy or dx or wadeva la... hahha ;P oops... sorry maths paper coming up for me.. :P ).
of course, i suppose for most of us, we usually take affirmation as encouragements. erm.. but of course, affirmation of a , erm , "good" kind...
haha.. not like "i affirm that you're a stupid, dumb, bodoh dodo, who is good for nothing and a scum of the earth. your ugliness gives me allergic reactions. HEY!! i'm encouraging you, k? so that you'll be encouraged to improve yourself!!!"
:D oops...
it's true, we all need encouragement. we can be encouragers too! by our lives.
oh wells... thank all of you bros (WG)... for your encouragement on each other.
i really hope we do continue this race together. and i do hope that our wg will not be based on us. but, ya.. you know where im driving at. (though i wont be taking my driving lessons anytime soon. haha.) thank all of you who wished me. Thanks. even though it can be an auto thing for some of us, i'm still encouraged.
haha... birthdays.
have they become a day where we have an excuse to celebrate the great ME?
i dont celebrate my birthday. and there was a year i even forgot.
oh wells, in this fallen world...
not that there's anything wrong in celebrating... in fact it's probably normal. im weird and atypical, u see. :D
who do we go to for support?
buddies?
stead?
parents (i doubt many will, yea? unfortunately)?
no one?
some stranger we meet in chat room or on the streets?
??? ?
we are human, and so we need human support and companionship... but because we're human, we fail too. humans fail each other. but the Almighty will not. know this, not because it's some abstract stoopeed concept, but cuz i know. first hand.
oh wells...
i know not what im typing anymore... cuz i seem not to be reflecting much these past weeks. reflecting in all sense of the word. oh wells... not really all. cuz i dont pose in front of the mirror everyhour, and exclaim how handsome and good-looking, and christ-like i am... ;P
LORD help.
no reflections (insights) in. no reflections (of Him) out.
have i lost it?
what?
i don't really know.
it seems blurry sometimes. when we just don't know what on earth is going on. or rather, we do. but... we don't.
so we don't know what is going on. but we do. and yet we don't. or do we?
heh...
crap... i really know not what i'm typing already. lack of sleep? i dunno. oh wells, stressed i am.
(tensile stress, compression stress, shear stress... oops.. sorry. )
escapism, i hope not to continue.
oh wellll....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With All I Am
into your hand
i commit again
with all I am
for you Lord
you hold my world
in the palm of your hand
and I'm yours forever
[CHORUS]
Jesus I believe in you
Jesus I belong to you
you're the reason that I live
the reason that I sing
with all I am
I'll walk with you
wherever you go
through tears and joy
I'll trust in you
and I will live
in all of your ways and
your promises forever
[CHORUS]
I will worship
I will worship you forever
i hope i can sing and mean what i sing
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
of leading others further than you've gone, and of rebel fingers.
think abt it... (for me lah).
do we sometimes take our freedom for granted? Though we do not have a kilometre-long list of dos and donts, but have we compromised? compromised too much.
that we take everything as ok. if you get my drift...
just cant get organised. the mess of my thoughts, the mess of my home, the mess of my life.
yea.. my "fingers are now running faster than my brain and heart"...
oh wells..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
sometimes i wonder, what or who do we go to for our encouragement?
sometimes i wonder, also, what some of us do just to get that phrase of encouragement.
i guess different people have been brought up differently and will take different things as their personal encouragement. and even the extent to which a person needs to be encouraged continually is also a variable (not x or y or xy or dx or wadeva la... hahha ;P oops... sorry maths paper coming up for me.. :P ).
of course, i suppose for most of us, we usually take affirmation as encouragements. erm.. but of course, affirmation of a , erm , "good" kind...
haha.. not like "i affirm that you're a stupid, dumb, bodoh dodo, who is good for nothing and a scum of the earth. your ugliness gives me allergic reactions. HEY!! i'm encouraging you, k? so that you'll be encouraged to improve yourself!!!"
:D oops...
it's true, we all need encouragement. we can be encouragers too! by our lives.
oh wells... thank all of you bros (WG)... for your encouragement on each other.
i really hope we do continue this race together. and i do hope that our wg will not be based on us. but, ya.. you know where im driving at. (though i wont be taking my driving lessons anytime soon. haha.) thank all of you who wished me. Thanks. even though it can be an auto thing for some of us, i'm still encouraged.
haha... birthdays.
have they become a day where we have an excuse to celebrate the great ME?
i dont celebrate my birthday. and there was a year i even forgot.
oh wells, in this fallen world...
not that there's anything wrong in celebrating... in fact it's probably normal. im weird and atypical, u see. :D
who do we go to for support?
buddies?
stead?
parents (i doubt many will, yea? unfortunately)?
no one?
some stranger we meet in chat room or on the streets?
??? ?
we are human, and so we need human support and companionship... but because we're human, we fail too. humans fail each other. but the Almighty will not. know this, not because it's some abstract stoopeed concept, but cuz i know. first hand.
oh wells...
i know not what im typing anymore... cuz i seem not to be reflecting much these past weeks. reflecting in all sense of the word. oh wells... not really all. cuz i dont pose in front of the mirror everyhour, and exclaim how handsome and good-looking, and christ-like i am... ;P
LORD help.
no reflections (insights) in. no reflections (of Him) out.
have i lost it?
what?
i don't really know.
it seems blurry sometimes. when we just don't know what on earth is going on. or rather, we do. but... we don't.
so we don't know what is going on. but we do. and yet we don't. or do we?
heh...
crap... i really know not what i'm typing already. lack of sleep? i dunno. oh wells, stressed i am.
(tensile stress, compression stress, shear stress... oops.. sorry. )
escapism, i hope not to continue.
oh wellll....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With All I Am
into your hand
i commit again
with all I am
for you Lord
you hold my world
in the palm of your hand
and I'm yours forever
[CHORUS]
Jesus I believe in you
Jesus I belong to you
you're the reason that I live
the reason that I sing
with all I am
I'll walk with you
wherever you go
through tears and joy
I'll trust in you
and I will live
in all of your ways and
your promises forever
[CHORUS]
I will worship
I will worship you forever
i hope i can sing and mean what i sing
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
of leading others further than you've gone, and of rebel fingers.
Thursday, August 03, 2006
another of those "is it coincidences"...
"The Lord gives and takes away."
different ones have this as part of their msn nick...
reminder. reminder. reminder.
is it timely? i dunno.
but it's still a good reminder...
:)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and exactly half my poly life is over. 3 sems done. 3 sems ahead.
oh wells, not exactly... still have exams for this sem.. hahaha
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
shall not blog for the sake of blogging.
and i wonder what this sat's msg gonna be on blogging... :D
it seems we can have a template for blogging...
:D:D oh wells.
"The Lord gives and takes away."
different ones have this as part of their msn nick...
reminder. reminder. reminder.
is it timely? i dunno.
but it's still a good reminder...
:)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and exactly half my poly life is over. 3 sems done. 3 sems ahead.
oh wells, not exactly... still have exams for this sem.. hahaha
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
shall not blog for the sake of blogging.
and i wonder what this sat's msg gonna be on blogging... :D
it seems we can have a template for blogging...
"sian, today was so _________________________ [sian, boring, tiring, screwed] sia. woke up, pissed, and i went to piss. then i brush my teeth. then i wash my face. got new pimple.
so i eat breakfast lor. then go to sch lor.
sch was boring today. _____________________ [so and so] was being his/her bitchy/idiotic self. so pissed with him/her la! piang, wish i could just _______________ [strangle, whack, shoot, kill] that friggin' _____________________ [open answer].
then i and _________________ [peeps' names]went out. AND WE _______________________[TOOK NEOPRINTS, shopping, something stupid, crazy] !!!! XDXD yipee!!!! yays...
and when we were at ________________ [somewhere], _________ [someone] started to do _________________ [something dumb and stupid].
man it was so fun!!!!! xP ^.^
and some pics!!!
*some pic*
this is me in ____________________ [subject] lesson
*some pic*
this is me again in ____________________ [subject] lesson
*some pic*
me again!!! i so cute hor =D
*some ridiculous pic*
this is me and ____________ [peep's name].
[some ridiculous caption to go with the ridiculous pic, followed by lotsa "!!!!!!!!!"]
*some pic*
this is me at ______________ [somewhere]
*some pic*
me again!!!
sian... now have to go do stupid _________________ [subject, usually "chinese"] homework.
________________ [teacher's name] is such a __________________________ [open answer]
sigh, its ________________________ [some evening time] liaoz... so sianz lorx! everyday life is so boring. and everyday must rant here.... sianz... then must take pic of myself. lucky the camera lens is pretty strong... cuz IM SO CUTE!!!! IM SO RANDOM!!! lalalala.
heex....goodnight.... hahahaz xD =) ^.^ "
:D:D oh wells.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)