they always say that our lives' transitions are little tests of faith.
and it seems like almost everyone i know now is going through some sort of transition in church.
the webs now have their wgs streamlined and re-shuffled. transition
the people closer to me in church are those in my age-group (who're 19-20) are now moving from web to rays. transitions
and for others, IDT. transitions
new age group, new cell groups, new timings, new clashes, new experience, new prorities???
and i wonder if like the many before, we'll fall away at such a time.
and i am really concerned for certain bros and sisters of mine who may have been strong once, but now because of all these... .....
and for myself too.
what if i one day go away?
what if one day i choose to give up this marathon?
what if one day i just choose to take it easy?
i realised that circumstances don't cause us to fall away, or sin for that matter.
but we choose to. it is a deliberate and we will like to think of it as a rational bo pian circumstancial choice we have made well.
we choose to fall away.
we choose to sin.
and it's a choice people will surely say "eeyur of course don't want lah". but we know the outcomes..........
quote of day : "If circumstances find us in God, we'll find God in our circumstances"
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
an understatement of The Love of God
i like songs laden with rich lyrics.
i guess it really is an understatement...
The love of God is greater far
Than tongue or pen can ever tell
It goes
beyond the highest star
And reaches to the lowest hell
The guilty pair,
bowed down with care
God gave His Son to win
His erring child He
reconciled
And pardoned from his sin
Could we with ink the ocean fil
And were the skies of parchment made
Were every stalk on earth a quill
And every man a scribe by trade
To write the love of God above
Would drain the ocean dry
Nor could the scroll contain the whol
Though stretched from sky to sky
Hallelujah (3x)
O love of
God, how rich and pure!
How measureless and strong!
It shall forevermore
endure
The saints' and angels' song
song here in my multiply...
Monday, February 12, 2007
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
what if....
...i have to extend my polytechnic life by around 6 months?
because of my discipline.
rather... the lackof.
oh wells.
song in my mind... :
"All things work for our good.
Though sometimes we don’t see how they could.
Struggles that break our hearts in two
Sometimes blind us to the truth.
Our Father knows what best for us he ways are not our own. ...
.
.
.
He’s see the master plan and He hold our future in His hand.
So don’t live as those who have no hope, for our hope is found in Him.
We see the present clearly, but he see the first and the last
And like a tapestry He’s weaving you and me to someday be just like Him.
.
.
.
trust His heart."
am i prepared to face the consequence?
6months/ a semester of time.
isn't small.
purpose for everything lah.......... trust lor.
because of my discipline.
rather... the lackof.
oh wells.
song in my mind... :
"All things work for our good.
Though sometimes we don’t see how they could.
Struggles that break our hearts in two
Sometimes blind us to the truth.
Our Father knows what best for us he ways are not our own. ...
.
.
.
He’s see the master plan and He hold our future in His hand.
So don’t live as those who have no hope, for our hope is found in Him.
We see the present clearly, but he see the first and the last
And like a tapestry He’s weaving you and me to someday be just like Him.
.
.
.
trust His heart."
am i prepared to face the consequence?
6months/ a semester of time.
isn't small.
purpose for everything lah.......... trust lor.
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
little by little by....
change.
little by little by..
step at a time!
it's better than having it, one shot a time..
little by little by,
i want to say hi(?!)
come into my life and clear it all up.
[heh... now that song (the original one) is stuck in my head :P ]
little by little by..
step at a time!
it's better than having it, one shot a time..
little by little by,
i want to say hi(?!)
come into my life and clear it all up.
[heh... now that song (the original one) is stuck in my head :P ]
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
a disappointing sem
i guess, it was just entropy.
a lazy, slothful, ill-disciplined streak since young that turned into a lifestyle. and it's no one's fault but mine.
tho of course, the tendency is that i tend to grumble and blame my environment, upbringing etc etc etc... but i guess.. at the far back end of our minds.. we can complain all we want, but that rational logical part that's still left, says "is it? really?? u sure?"
gah...
i'm so disappointed. but. i chose not to do anything bout it.
in fact it got worst as the sem proceeded.
grades got worse. studying durations got shorter. stewardships of time and money got worse.
and if this goes on, it will only get worse.
and that's an understatement i suppose...
and the ironic thing is that, i started off this sem reading proverbs. where there are many proverbs about sloths and laziness and ill-discipline and nuahness.
and i took it as a warning.
but.
oh wells.
and right now as the sem closes before the exams... i've pissed my pract teammates off cuz of my own incompetencies, and ill-discipline.
what a great testimony. esp when ppl know i am a so-called 'active christian'. and esp when ppl know what my ministry (or for them, my cca) in sch is rite now.
esp this esp that.
and it brings it a few steps back.
it brings more potholes for people to poke and discredit our God. it gives them something to say against.
oh wells. if it's like that now.. i wonder how it will be when i work.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
just a random thing:
sacrifices to be made.
that's when you really question yourself. are you willing to sacrifice time at a weird time for someone you don't really know yet.
we ask for friends who will be there for us... i guess i'm far far far from that friend. i am willing. but there are buts.
oh wells. a world where we are all fishmongers. or fishermen's friend for that matter.
we sell fish.
ironic isn't it? we sell fish, but we're all called to be fishers of men.
hmm.
for the really blur: sell fish = selfish
a lazy, slothful, ill-disciplined streak since young that turned into a lifestyle. and it's no one's fault but mine.
tho of course, the tendency is that i tend to grumble and blame my environment, upbringing etc etc etc... but i guess.. at the far back end of our minds.. we can complain all we want, but that rational logical part that's still left, says "is it? really?? u sure?"
gah...
i'm so disappointed. but. i chose not to do anything bout it.
in fact it got worst as the sem proceeded.
grades got worse. studying durations got shorter. stewardships of time and money got worse.
and if this goes on, it will only get worse.
and that's an understatement i suppose...
and the ironic thing is that, i started off this sem reading proverbs. where there are many proverbs about sloths and laziness and ill-discipline and nuahness.
and i took it as a warning.
but.
oh wells.
and right now as the sem closes before the exams... i've pissed my pract teammates off cuz of my own incompetencies, and ill-discipline.
what a great testimony. esp when ppl know i am a so-called 'active christian'. and esp when ppl know what my ministry (or for them, my cca) in sch is rite now.
esp this esp that.
and it brings it a few steps back.
it brings more potholes for people to poke and discredit our God. it gives them something to say against.
oh wells. if it's like that now.. i wonder how it will be when i work.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
just a random thing:
sacrifices to be made.
that's when you really question yourself. are you willing to sacrifice time at a weird time for someone you don't really know yet.
we ask for friends who will be there for us... i guess i'm far far far from that friend. i am willing. but there are buts.
oh wells. a world where we are all fishmongers. or fishermen's friend for that matter.
we sell fish.
ironic isn't it? we sell fish, but we're all called to be fishers of men.
hmm.
for the really blur: sell fish = selfish
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
cf. thanksgiving. 06
year 2 has come and is coming to an end real soon. yea its weird.
the year ends when the year starts.
the academic year lah.
which means that dreaded, dreary cycle of exams and mugging, and etcetera.
and it also means, i will be senior. i will be year 3 in a few months time. and it means the current year 3s are graduating
duh right?? :P
had our last cf of yr06/07 just hours ago...
and it's the last cf of two dear sisters. yan sing and yufang...
haha.. guess we will all miss them... oh wells. so glad to have known you gals.
and of course suan-ing you all ;P hahhaa.. hey.. i'm not the most guilty right? :D:D:D:D
ah wells.
the 2 of you! if you ever read this... thanks for the memories of 2006.
indeed our God has been so good this... erm, last year (i must update myself mannn!!!)
through out 06, from the beginning, God has been just so good, so faithful, as He has always been and will be... so so amazing...
i'm just so glad i'm part of all these, and His work.
just to mention a few:
let's start from the beginning of acad yr 06/07...
basically the whole PCF had so few people (around 10 people from 3 language ministries combined) before the year started.
but.. in my whole time in SP, i never realised it could have been one of the more happening cf times...
we prayed. and God answered. He's cool i tell you. (though it may sound that i'm some holey moley waste canal. cant be bothered with what people think really.)
among the many was that, we prayed for musicians, at least 1, and we got 4.
and we prayed for people who wants to really serve Him through CF, and be called and committed. and we got an overly-enthu guy. ;P hahhahahha...
there was enrolment and cca booth. and we got soo many names. didn't do much.
but i guess it was an encouragement to us. even NPCF. they had 3 members left. and now God has answered their prayers too!
but i guess what was the whole highlight of the beginning of the year, was our welcome tea. sooo many people came (of course not many stayed on, but still....) it was truly amazing, since before that the 3subministries never really did interact that much. but 06 changed that... we had a camp.
that camp.. whoa... so much provisions. from basic things, to even the budget.
from a deficit to a surplus leh!!!
oh wells.. many more...
hmm don't we all have stories to share about His faithfulness even in our own lives and ministries? but more often than not, when we plan stuff, we worry like siao trying to see if it will work out, or if even WE can or not. and we totally forget all His blessings.and we go thru lives worrying, and living without even a consideration that He can do it again.
we just forget.
anyways.. just wanted to blog and share this only cuz... it's the last cf day for 06/07.
07/08 would mean something different i guess. and i guess more of His goodness. His faithfulness, in our faithlessness.
yea as i was saying, those 2 sisters... thanks for everything!
oh wells. typing a post here would actually do injustice to what i have to say to you gals... so.. haha.. u readers will just know i am quite thankful.
(actually the real reason is that i am tired and i dowan to type so much anymore :P:P hahhahahhaha oops ;D )
oh wells.
07/08.
Lord.. You will show Yourself so true once again i'm sure. And You will do something in-us-through-us to the campus.
I know You will Lord.
hey those people waiting for Os results, intending to go poly or u got posted to poly after ur Os results..
and yea, i am talking to you people like Jan, Erika, Denis, Nicole Ding, you all lah...
do consider joining us on this journey, whichever poly u go.
consider only lah, wont push you to join us, cuz ultimately (i believe) it's He who calls us to whereever He wants us to be in, and to serve.
haha.. anyways. my mind is getting fizzed.
chain of thoughts getting random.
i'm thankful.
=)
the year ends when the year starts.
the academic year lah.
which means that dreaded, dreary cycle of exams and mugging, and etcetera.
and it also means, i will be senior. i will be year 3 in a few months time. and it means the current year 3s are graduating
duh right?? :P
had our last cf of yr06/07 just hours ago...
and it's the last cf of two dear sisters. yan sing and yufang...
haha.. guess we will all miss them... oh wells. so glad to have known you gals.
and of course suan-ing you all ;P hahhaa.. hey.. i'm not the most guilty right? :D:D:D:D
ah wells.
the 2 of you! if you ever read this... thanks for the memories of 2006.
indeed our God has been so good this... erm, last year (i must update myself mannn!!!)
through out 06, from the beginning, God has been just so good, so faithful, as He has always been and will be... so so amazing...
i'm just so glad i'm part of all these, and His work.
just to mention a few:
let's start from the beginning of acad yr 06/07...
basically the whole PCF had so few people (around 10 people from 3 language ministries combined) before the year started.
but.. in my whole time in SP, i never realised it could have been one of the more happening cf times...
we prayed. and God answered. He's cool i tell you. (though it may sound that i'm some holey moley waste canal. cant be bothered with what people think really.)
among the many was that, we prayed for musicians, at least 1, and we got 4.
and we prayed for people who wants to really serve Him through CF, and be called and committed. and we got an overly-enthu guy. ;P hahhahahha...
there was enrolment and cca booth. and we got soo many names. didn't do much.
but i guess it was an encouragement to us. even NPCF. they had 3 members left. and now God has answered their prayers too!
but i guess what was the whole highlight of the beginning of the year, was our welcome tea. sooo many people came (of course not many stayed on, but still....) it was truly amazing, since before that the 3subministries never really did interact that much. but 06 changed that... we had a camp.
that camp.. whoa... so much provisions. from basic things, to even the budget.
from a deficit to a surplus leh!!!
oh wells.. many more...
hmm don't we all have stories to share about His faithfulness even in our own lives and ministries? but more often than not, when we plan stuff, we worry like siao trying to see if it will work out, or if even WE can or not. and we totally forget all His blessings.and we go thru lives worrying, and living without even a consideration that He can do it again.
we just forget.
anyways.. just wanted to blog and share this only cuz... it's the last cf day for 06/07.
07/08 would mean something different i guess. and i guess more of His goodness. His faithfulness, in our faithlessness.
yea as i was saying, those 2 sisters... thanks for everything!
oh wells. typing a post here would actually do injustice to what i have to say to you gals... so.. haha.. u readers will just know i am quite thankful.
(actually the real reason is that i am tired and i dowan to type so much anymore :P:P hahhahahhaha oops ;D )
oh wells.
07/08.
Lord.. You will show Yourself so true once again i'm sure. And You will do something in-us-through-us to the campus.
I know You will Lord.
hey those people waiting for Os results, intending to go poly or u got posted to poly after ur Os results..
and yea, i am talking to you people like Jan, Erika, Denis, Nicole Ding, you all lah...
do consider joining us on this journey, whichever poly u go.
consider only lah, wont push you to join us, cuz ultimately (i believe) it's He who calls us to whereever He wants us to be in, and to serve.
haha.. anyways. my mind is getting fizzed.
chain of thoughts getting random.
i'm thankful.
=)
Sunday, January 14, 2007
pride
more of Him.
Seek His Kingdom first.
obey.
that's all i wanna say... Once again... or rather.. this time.. really cannot be mistaken. the events, the sermons, the exhortations, and my own reflections and struggles. even the people around me day after day.
all on pride.
on a different aspect of it though, for me... an aspect of pride i never really took seriously.
still trying to articulate it in my mind what it is actually. wellsss.
pride seems like it has the dubious honour of being that sin that's so insidious, you won't even know u are sinning.
oh wells.
a gd closure to certain qns in my mind in today's senior web meeting. and another message from Him to me.
Seek His Kingdom first.
obey.
that's all i wanna say... Once again... or rather.. this time.. really cannot be mistaken. the events, the sermons, the exhortations, and my own reflections and struggles. even the people around me day after day.
all on pride.
on a different aspect of it though, for me... an aspect of pride i never really took seriously.
still trying to articulate it in my mind what it is actually. wellsss.
pride seems like it has the dubious honour of being that sin that's so insidious, you won't even know u are sinning.
oh wells.
a gd closure to certain qns in my mind in today's senior web meeting. and another message from Him to me.
Monday, January 08, 2007
guarding my heart...
from heart attack? haha scared kena deathnote ah.. :P hahah jk.(hor zeph?)
from pride.
fri's dawn prayer msg, and sun's msg were both timely.
though timely in a different sense.
fri:
of comparison.
my security isn't on the right place at times.
why do i even place so much emphasis on friendship?
only God put things right. He is indeed our security.
a very fine security. and that's an understatement! :D
sun:
guard hearts.
against fear and pride.
when things go well and/or better than you expected.
i sense pride wanting to visit me bigg time this year. this academic year 07/08.
and it may be in that ministry i am serving at.
i guess sunday was a timely warning. a warning before everything starts.
and if i am called and chosen, i suppose.. these are the exact two issues i would face.
fear. pride.
GOD, be God and Lord.
oh wells. it's at the beginning of the year. before it all starts.
nic of the future... i wonder what you'll (me lah) be thankful for when everything's over. will you (i) fall to myself? my own pride?
position does not allow us to be proud.
but i suppose, if i do get called and get chosen, it will be a burden. spiritual burden, to pray for it. and for right decisions.
i'd rather not actually, lest it becomes all about me.
my decisions, my this my that.
and i will feel gd bout it only cuz that in worldly terms, it looks gd.
something to do with furniture lah. stools or tables or maybe even chairs... :P:P:P :D hahaha... anyways.
oh wells, i shall wait till all is finalised. again, lest i get too carried away like it's already happened.
if i get excited about it, i am only opening the door to pride, and his cousins and relatives, and siblings to have lunch (not tea =D ) with me.
new lessons to be learnt this year i guess!
it will never end man.
and maybe some revisions on past lessons!! hahaa...
heh, life's really like school.
School of Rose Growing maybe??
beautiful times of roses, and thorny times of, erm, thorns? ;P but our 'gardener' is Him!
oh wells.
hey my fellow classmates!
from pride.
fri's dawn prayer msg, and sun's msg were both timely.
though timely in a different sense.
fri:
of comparison.
my security isn't on the right place at times.
why do i even place so much emphasis on friendship?
only God put things right. He is indeed our security.
a very fine security. and that's an understatement! :D
sun:
guard hearts.
against fear and pride.
when things go well and/or better than you expected.
i sense pride wanting to visit me bigg time this year. this academic year 07/08.
and it may be in that ministry i am serving at.
i guess sunday was a timely warning. a warning before everything starts.
and if i am called and chosen, i suppose.. these are the exact two issues i would face.
fear. pride.
GOD, be God and Lord.
oh wells. it's at the beginning of the year. before it all starts.
nic of the future... i wonder what you'll (me lah) be thankful for when everything's over. will you (i) fall to myself? my own pride?
position does not allow us to be proud.
but i suppose, if i do get called and get chosen, it will be a burden. spiritual burden, to pray for it. and for right decisions.
i'd rather not actually, lest it becomes all about me.
my decisions, my this my that.
and i will feel gd bout it only cuz that in worldly terms, it looks gd.
something to do with furniture lah. stools or tables or maybe even chairs... :P:P:P :D hahaha... anyways.
oh wells, i shall wait till all is finalised. again, lest i get too carried away like it's already happened.
if i get excited about it, i am only opening the door to pride, and his cousins and relatives, and siblings to have lunch (not tea =D ) with me.
new lessons to be learnt this year i guess!
it will never end man.
and maybe some revisions on past lessons!! hahaa...
heh, life's really like school.
School of Rose Growing maybe??
beautiful times of roses, and thorny times of, erm, thorns? ;P but our 'gardener' is Him!
oh wells.
hey my fellow classmates!
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