LORD?

i realised that i was posted to a specialisation that i really do not want to go. Crap...

only have myself to blame.

i AM disappointed.

i will probably be alone, and separated from my buddies i made in yr1... sigh... it's so rare that deep friendships occur in schools. as in really deep ones... sigh... i take friendships seriously, and this is me lah...

but as someone reminded me recently....
don't let friendships and relationships be an idol.

because i have a Best Friend in Christ!

i don't want to wallow in my self-pity and make the situation seem like it's beyond cure... as if i will be barred from any job opportunities... (though it IS true that my specialisation now has a very very small job scope in Singapore.... )

i hope and PRAY that it will be a blessing in disguise...

Actually.. i KNOW it will be a blessing in disguise. it will be to show those around me just how GREAT A GOD I WORSHIP. i believe, really in faith, that His glory will be shown.

no, really!

because HE IS SOVEREIGN AND LORD.

as JonQ said during a recent wg meeting...
we truly need to know the meaning of LORD. or when we address Him as LORD.

are we practicing our lives with Him as LORD?
or it's just a thing we mouth out when we pray? (that's if we even pray in the first place...)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i need to surrender...

i thot this issue was over...
i thot that i had surrendered...
i thot i had trusted Him to provide me.
i thot.

but did i?

now... it's more complicated... as if my life was a movie or play or even a TV serial......
(or like that Navy advert says.... "if life were a movie, would it be a good one???")with new characters popping into the scene... making peaceful status quo complicated, and messing up thoughts, feelings and even lives...

God.
please be LORD of my life.